Like water off a duck's back

It is pleasing to note that there are people out there who don’t just add their opinion to and comment upon Cicero’s opinions, but who also take the time and trouble to help Cicero understand better the vernacular of the modern world. We are all indebted to Anonymous for defining the word ‘mojo’. And if you don’t what we are talking about, please see last week’s dose of wit and wisdom and the comments subsequently appended.

And as you will no doubt agree wholeheartedly, Cicero has lost none of his ‘uncanny personal power or influence’ as projected through these words.

And so to this week’s soupcon of wisdom and enlightenment.

Last week Cicero had to persuade a mightily important Head Honcho heading up a business offering services to other businesses that his newly carefully crafted marketing strategy could be likened to ‘throwing bread on the water for the ducks’.

To say he was puzzled was an understatement but after explanation he soon got and understood the analogy and this analogy will be relevant to many of you also marketing to other businesses.

For what happens when you throw bread on the water in front of ducks? They will take a nibble of some of your crusts. And the more bread you throw, the more likely you are to get the ducks to nibble. Sometimes marketing is just so simple.

For unlike marketing to consumers, it is mightily difficult with B2B services to stimulate demand. Customers are not going to buy more engines, machine tools or even accountancy services just because you have tried to market to them. No matter how good your marketing might be, and we know it will be very good, such decisions are not taken spontaneously or without deep and detailed consideration of all the options, suppliers and costs. We are talking here about major purchase and investment decisions.

In market places like these therefore the role of the marketer is to keep the spotlight on the name and the proposition through as many channels as possible so that when the buy decision gets made, your brand remains top of mind. It is just like feeding ducks.

And to make this happen great marketers will use every means at their disposal to communicate with the market through as many broadcast and narrowcast media as possible-ads of course, but also things like PR releases, surveys, events, thought pieces, seminars, direct marketing, tweets and so on. The list is endless. And the challenge is on to find interesting ways to keep your name in lights and to keep renting space in the mind of your target and potential customers. Even Christmas Cards, ooooops sorry, Season’s Greetings Cards, we must not offend the Politically Correct Brigade, and diaries emblazoned with the brand, get sucked into this battle and at this time of the year get drafted in as bread for ducks. And you thought it was because someone wanted to be nice to you. Foolish and naive child.

Take a look at service firms’ websites. You will see them loaded with blogs, newsletters, press releases, events and sign up opportunities. And every one of these pieces of communication is designed to get their name into the market place and in front of customers and to keep it there. They are always finding reasons to communicate, something to say, opinions to be expressed. In short they are constantly throwing bread on the water. And this is what lies at the heart of a great Quack Quack Marketing Strategy-it is all about finding things to talk about with your market.

And hopefully you get it now........just like Cicero’s Head Honcho.

You may think that the things you read here a wee bit bonkers. This time the idea really is quackers. Quack, quack.

Is it only me........but I’m not so sure that this really is good news.

While reading widely the other day to ensure my knowledge and wisdom were being kept up to date, I came across an announcement from the latest and newest government Quango, the independent Office for Budget Responsibility, and was struck dumb.

It seems that this Quango now expects 330,000 public sector Apparatchiks to lose their jobs over the next four years, far fewer than the 490,000 it forecast in its June report. This is no doubt good news to the 160,000 Apparatchiks who will be kept on at taxpayer expense. But what about the rest of us?

The OBR Quangocrats have said it had changed the Apparatchik job forecast because the government of the Two Caesars ‘ had put more emphasis on welfare cuts and less on departmental spending cuts since it made its earlier forecast.’

Now far be it for me, a humble marketing personage to query the role and capability of this economic Quango but I do not greet this announcement with vocal whoops of joy, a lot of high fiving and heaps of knuckle knocking. Is this really good news-fewer Apparatchiks than previously thought to be culled?

But surely the OBR is looking at the issue through the wrong end of the telescope. And given that the key word in the title of the OBR is ‘responsibility, might I respectfully suggest that the Head OBR Quangocrat listen up and pay attention before he, or she, becomes the Head of the Office of Budget Irresponsibility.

The real issue is not that fewer Apparatchiks than previously thought might need to learn to SatNav to their local Job Centre Plus but how many we actually need or how many we, the hard pressed tax payers, are willing to pay for. And this is what I would like the OBR to examine if it wants to retain its moniker.

In short at the end of the day whether it be 330,000 or 490,000 fewer, we are just circumcising gnats. Tough on those involved but no tougher than the circumstances being faced by those in the wealth creating sector for a good while now. And given the size of the Apparatchik sector, this level of circumcision should be accomplished relatively pain free and should be well within natural levels of people turnover.

Hopefully one or even both of the Two Caesars is reading and sharing my thinking. Just trying to be helpful as usual.

What do you think?

Have a great week.

Sis felix. Et sis fortunatus.