Breast strokes

Now it might only be me...but could someone explain to me why I should foot the bill for this.

Be warned-feminstas and Guardianistas might not want to read this!
If I buy a car and something drops off I take it back to the garage and, dependent on circumstances, I would either expect the garage to fix the faulty part or give me money back. I would not expect the taxpayer to pick up the bill and pay for the repairs. So could someone please explain to me the difference between a broken part on a car and broken breast implant.

Over the weekend I watched an endless parade of photogenic women wailing and caterwauling because the NHS, and for NHS read you and me, would only pay to have their implants removed and not replaced if these had been installed privately in the first place. And of course these moaning minnies do not have the spondooliks to pay for the damage to be corrected. Bless! My heart bleeds!

As an aside don't you think it a fanatastic coincidence that the only people who seem to have had such treatment, if the media are to be believed are young, incredibly photogenic and gobby! Does no-one over the age of 35 go for bigger breasts?

And of they bitterly resent having to pay again to be restored to a busty DDD cup because the NHS, i.e. you and me, would not install new implants. Seemingly this would cause ‘untold psychological damage’.

Now it is my understanding that if you paid to go private in the first instance it was most likely because you could not get the treatment on the NHS. In other words it was for cosmetic and not for medical reasons. Given this I really do fail to see why I should foot the bill just because these distaffs want to be bustier.

In any event, love, I would advise that before turning to the taxpayer to fund your Jordan-esque desire, you should, before you inflict yourself on us through your TV mates, demanding your so-called rights, ask your private clinic to make good the damage. That is what I would do if Kwik Fit fitted me with a faulty exhaust. Is there any difference?

I can just about accept that if you been fitted with an unhealthy product that the NHS should foot the bill. After all it is about preserving the health of the nation but unless I missed something during my sex education lessons, I cannot remember wee, misshapen or even extra large breasts being a threat to people’s health.

Nor can I recall large busts being covered by the Human Rights Acts though given the nonsense covered by this most pointless piece of legislation, this might be something I missed.

And as for the psychological effects, my advice, darling, get over it. The NHS has far more important things to do with our money that pay for your self inflicted psychological damage.

Have a great week...whatever your breast size!

Sis felix. Et sis fortunatus.