I'm not as clever as I thought I was!

This week Cicero has had an epiphany moment. Indeed it is more than a moment. It might not be quite on the scale of a Pauline Damascene-esque conversion but it is right up there with some of the best flip flops of all time. And before this is shared with you, please make sure you are seated with no sharp objects or warm liquids to hand.

And this week’s shocks news which will come as a surprise to you, especially if you are of a data manipulating eco-mentalist persuasion, Cicero now admits that global warming, climate change, wonky weather, or whatever this week’s fashionable term might be, might be happening. Are you still there?

Now news of this import requires explanation. Why the change the mind? Well, in the absence of hard data which as the eco-mentalists know is hard to come by since they destroyed it once they had sexed it up a bit, Cicero has used other climatic and meteorological indicators to reach this conclusion.

Now you might not know this but each and every day Cicero braves the wrath of the Capital’s bendy buses and cycles on his week bike across town to the TSSB where he plies his trade. Proof that Cicero is concerned about his carbon footprint.

Anyway it is now mid December and Cicero continues to be seen about town on his wee bike in shorts. Now this might not be a pretty sight but never have shorts been worn so late in year. Surely proof positive that we are in midst of wonky weather. And so Cicero is convinced.

And in case there is an eco-mentalist out there who thinks that Cicero will now move on to challenge other moronities, think again. This is a subject to which Cicero intends to return. The case for man made climate change is far from proven and after the wilful destruction and obscuring of objectivity on this matter, rest assured we will re-visit this topic in the coming weeks. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

And in other shocking news this week Cicero has learnt that he is not as clever as he thought he was.

Now this is difficult to believe and this revelation almost caused Ciceronic depression for it seems that there is more than one kind of intelligence and Cicero might have the wrong one. You probably didn’t even know that you could have the wrong kind of intelligence but seemingly just as trains can be affected by the wrong kind of snow and water companies by the wrong kind of rain, it is now possible to have the wrong kind of intelligence.

Up until now you might have thought that proof of Cicero’s intelligence and ability was based on an endless supply of good ideas, an incisive mind and well developed technical skills. Imagine the let down and disappointment when you learn that nowadays this is nowhere near good enough. This type of intelligence is only an entry level requirement to be able to meet the requirements of working in the Top Secret State Bunker and for doing the job of protecting you.

Are you as gutted as Cicero was when he discovered this devastating news. It seems that for anyone to do their job properly the right kind of intelligence to have these days is Emotional Intelligence.

What is it? And why is it important, why is it relevant to us and our businesses?

It seems that to become as intelligent emotionally as we like to think we are as a common or garden intelligent person we need to develop and learn, if not too late, new skills.

To succeed we need self awareness and to be in touch with our emotions, drives and moods and their effect on others. This is an easy one. Cicero is never moody.

Secondly, we need to have the ability to control or re-direct our disruptive impulses and moods. Cicero will skip that one.

Thirdly we need to have a strong desire and be well motivated to achieve. No problem.

And we are now required to have the social skills needed to manage relationships and build networks Got that one unless its time to buy a round..

Lastly, emotional intelligence requires us to understand the emotional make up of other people and to empathise with the needs and wants of others. Now it’s got real hard to be intelligent.

So to be intelligent in today’s workplace requires us to understand others and their feelings, and to understand ourselves, our goals, our moods and our behaviour. Whatever happened to the other kind of intelligence? Cicero was good at that one

However to be emotionally dumb is not an option. What kind of an organisation would you like to be a customer of? Where would you like to work?

To be the kind of human and creative business we want for our customers and for ourselves, we need to continue to develop and grow in emotional intelligence. We must continue to show self awareness, an ability to control our emotions, to demonstrate a passion to achieve for customers and colleagues, to empathise with people, and to build proficiency in managing relationships.

Consider two airlines-Virgin and Ryanair. Where would you prefer to work? With whom would you prefer to fly? Which has the higher level of emotional intelligence as a business, as a brand?

Cicero has come across few with emotional intelligence. It is a rare gift. And someone with it is to be loved, cherished and kept close. The world and your life is truly a better place for their presence in it. You can trust Cicero on this one. He has experience of EI people.

Is it only me?

And so to this week’s big question-should bankers get a bonus?

No doubt you will have been wondering all week through the media and political emotional knee jerk response to this issue, if Cicero had a view on such a topic. Of course Cicero has a view. And as is the wont of this column the Ciceronic opinion is not one to make Cicero popular. No matter. Truth as always will out though it often takes a week or two before public opinion catches up.

And before dispensing views and opinions on this matter, it is worth pointing out that prior to Cicero practising his marketing genius and alchemy on your behalf, such genius was previously applied to the financial services industry though the views formed on bankers’ bonuses are formed independently of these experiences. In any event Cicero never did benefit from such levels of largesse and generosity.

Over the past year we as taxpayers have sunk billions into our banks to ensure that when we went to a cash machine our money was there. And sure these bankers now us all a wee bit more than the price of a three bedrooms semi detached house. And we might no longer think of these people as masters of the universe and indeed we might even call them a word that rhymes with bankers.

Now it might only be me, and now given that the mission of this piece is to go boldly where no one has gone before, and to go there in a grammatically correct way, you will note, but I would like my money back at some point and if this means that a few pinstripes have to be paid a wee bit more to deliver so that I can get my money back, big deal.

Please can we stop all this hysteria which has all the similarities of a KKK lynch mob? Can we end the populist appeal to the base instincts of the mob? Can we cease the political posturing and futile political gestures? It is also worth remembering that screaming foul on bonuses is a handy diversion from the very fraudulent expense fiddles practiced by our MPs. No wonder they are keen to attack the pinstripe and red braces brigade.

So can we get back to sanity? Pay the bankers what is needed so we can get our loans back and let our banks perform. But let’s make sure that we more properly align the needs of bankers with those of the taxpayer and the shareholder.

All I want are my bawbees back. And I am sure you do too.

Have a great week.

Sis felix. Et sis fortunatus.