In God we trust

Great to see you again.

It seems that some of you are determined to try to take Cicero down a peg or two. Last week we had the comments about Cicero’s antediluvian status and now it would seem that Cicero’s amanuensis, who checks these fine words each week for typographical errors, wants to get in on the act.

For on reading Cicero’s crafted and beautifully formed words and phrases last week and having been asked to critique these, reflected for a moment and then declaimed to Cicero through secret and most private back channels (and that does not mean what you might be thinking) that ‘it was all me, me me’. Though the ‘is it only me…..’ piece did meet with approbation.

This week Cicero will attempt to be ‘you, you, you’.

And now for the news you have all been waiting for-the winner of the most pointless app award which we will dub the Archimedes Award. This revered scientist will surely be spinning and gyrating in his grave that science and technology have developed to such pointless futility.

And the winner of the Aristotle Award for 2010 is ‘Panda Jumps’. ACDs can now relieve their suffering with this pointless app.

If Anonymous will forward his or her contact details, a prize will be winging its way to them.

Cicero has been commended. A most rare event.

It seems that you are surprised that he would publish a comment which let us say was not totally complimentary about Cicero, his age and his attitude to technology. Of course such comments get published, even if they are woefully wrong. There is no censorship or news management here. We have new Caesars now. This is not the old Caesar. Or even the one before him. It is a very different world.

And one last thought. Cicero is reportedly jumping with joy that so many of his enlightened devotees have registered their pride in the eyesore that is Parliament Square. It seems you are not ashamed by this spectacle but take pride that this is tolerated. Thank you.

And while on the subject of Parliament, Cicero is disheartened that once again the behaviours of our new lords and masters have in some people’s eyes damaged the trust and reputation of this institution. It is not for Cicero to pass judgment on the rights and wrongs of the latest episode but there is nothing more important than trust and reputation to individuals, to brands and businesses. You can’t buy it. You can’t claim it. You can only earn it. And once earnt over weeks, months, years, decades, it can be destroyed in a moment. Talk to the Head Honcho at BP if you want to know more.

But do you know how to build trust? It seems that it is no more than an arithmetical formula. Euclid and Pythagoras will both be pleased. Unlike our hard working and noble amanuensis, Cicero is not great at maths but even he gets this equation, so it can’t be too difficult.

Let me explain.

Now this is not Cicero’s own work but that of one whose brain is far more enlightened than his, but given that Cicero believes that innovation is only undiscovered plagiarism he is shameless in passing the learning on.

The Trust Formula starts with a sum.

We take Reliability-do you, your brand or your business do what you say you are going to do, what you promise to do, when and how you say you are going to do it? And do you do it every time? If you say you are going to do something and you do, then Trust starts to build.

To Reliability we add Expertise. The more you are expert in doing a job, the more special and unique you are then once again Trust builds. The expertise, the knowledge, the intellectual property, you, your business, your brand, is what you have to offer and what people buy. Protect it wisely.

And to Reliability plus Expertise we add Empathy. Do people like you? Can you get onto their wave length and think like them? Can you get close to people, your customers, and share their thoughts and values, their ambitions and aspirations.

We now have a sum. But this does not equal Trust.

To finalise the Trust Equation we divide the sum of Reliability plus Expertise plus Empathy by Self Interest. This is the killer. This is the thing that destroys Trust. The more you or your business or your brand is perceived to be acting in your own self interest, the less people will trust you.

Think MPs. Think banks. Think estate agents.

At the end of the day it is the perception that counts and if you, your business or your brand can convince your customers that you are acting in their interests and not the customer’s, the more Trust will build and you, your business and your brand will prosper. You might be racking in big profits, but if you are perceived to be acting in the customers’ interests, you will be rewarded.

Anyone who has ever watched ‘Miracle on 34th Street, a great film, will know that American dollar bills all contain the immortal strap line ‘In God we trust’. As strap lines go this is surely much better than ‘every little helps’. Clearly He has done the maths and no one could ever doubt that God ever acts out of self interest. Now surely that’s a target for all of us, all our businesses and all our brands to aspire to. You can trust me on this.

Is it only me…….but maybe some people are just not good enough?

Did you read the news a few days back that some Educational Apparatchik, heading up a quango that it is unlikely you or anyone on the Clapham Omnibus might have heard of even if we, the taxpayer, are subsidising his lifestyle, and no doubt lavishly, has announced that ‘young people from poorer backgrounds are still struggling to get into top universities’?

No doubt this man and his fellow quangocrats are well meaning and have the best intentions of us all at heart. No doubt he seriously wants to improve society and make us all equal. He claims that poorer kids fail to reach their potential because, and this is a direct quote, ‘poorer youngsters are more likely to underperform in exams than their better-off counterparts, which means they might miss out on the grades needed for the most competitive courses’.

And the solution proposed for this shocking state of affairs is that our unis need to make more effort to accommodate such dunderheads and relax their admission requirements. You do really have to wonder if we, the taxpayer, are getting value for money from this quangocrat.

Now maybe it is just me but as the learned Apparatchik has so rightly pointed out, maybe, just maybe, these kids are just too thick to get into university and equally important, stay in for the duration.

University is not for everyone and not everyone is good enough to go. It is a harsh truth but someone needs to say it. It is not a human right that you must get into university come what may. And we must stop using university admissions to social engineer society.

Maybe my learned friend instead of moaning how bad it is that poorer children cannot get into university, would offer more value for our taxes if he concentrated on lambasting those who have wrecked the educational system which has denied bright kids from poorer backgrounds the opportunity to realise their potential and to properly earn the right to get to uni.

Should our schools not be providing the brighter kids with the skills and the confidence to pass their exams and apply for the top unis.? This might be radical but instead of taking a pop at the unis Cicero suggests that this man has a right go at the educational establishment of this country who are failing those with the potential from all backgrounds to go as far as they can educationally. It is a right disgrace.

And one final thought on this. Not going to uni is not the end of the world. And people like Mr Quangocrat should not make people feel a failure if they don't go. Instead we should recognise and celebrate their achievements and contribution. Uni is not for everyone.

Who do you back on this? Mr Quango or Cicero? Let us know.

Have a great week.

Sis felix. Et sis fortunatus.